Suffering

On Easter Monday three years ago I was diagnosed with cancer.  I continue to be grateful to God and the power of others’ prayers to bring about my healing.

At that time I was weak spiritually, weak in body and discouraged in my mind.  I had no strength of my own left.  I was like the man who was let down through the roof by his friends to get to Jesus. Jesus told the man your sins are forgiven, rise up and walk. My family and friends brought me to Jesus and to His sacrifice on the cross for my sin and my sicknesses.

When I was weak I had to depend on others and ultimately on God.  My sickness broke my independence, my pride, my self-righteousness, my anger, my control and my fear.

Mark  9v:49 says  “… for everyone will be purified with fire” NLT

I went through the fire like the three men in the fiery furnace.  A man was with them in the fire and so was Jesus with me in my hour of affliction.  I had to go through the treatment of chemotherapy and radiotherapy.  I was overwhelmed at the thought of a big operation, the anguish of whether I would recover, and the sadness of possibly leaving my family.  There is one who understood what I was going through.  Jesus suffered pain and anguish on the cross.  He understood.  He touched me with the power that healed the man let down through the roof and healed me.  Alleluia.  There is power in the name of Jesus and in his blood.

As time passed God showed me how Jesus was broken on the cross, and how he suffered whips on his back and piercing on his head, his hands and feet and his side.  He shed his blood for me to forgive my sins and offer healing to my body and healing for my mental anguish.  My suffering worked patience and mercy in me.  I grew to know God’s love and care for me and the love and care of my family and others.  I praise and thank him daily.  Hopefully I became a nicer person to live with.  I seek to forgive others and not be offended because I am forgiven much.

I now live in God’s strength.  When I was weak I came to rely more on his strength and power to help me.   Psalm 55 v 22 says “Cast your cares upon the Lord”. I had to say to God, “I cannot make it on my own”.  It is God’s mercy working in our lives that we go through pain, failure or disappointment.  He brings us to a place when it will be true as in John 15 v 5 “Apart from me you can do nothing”.

Angela

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